Monday, 31 December 2018

My 2018 :)

Haha, so I didn't end up writing so much this year, despite promising to in the only other piece I posted this year. It's been quite mad, and if I'm being honest, it hasn't really been the best. When I wrote last year that it had been a rough year, I hadn't really thought on ahead to what 2018 might bring. There have been joyous moments this year that have made me feel like I'm flying: giddy-giggling like a toddler on a sugar-high... the family trip to Portugal, when Mr EP met the family, the Mancheste Bees.... But there have been moments too where I just wanted to crawl into a hole and stay there forever.

I am determined however that this isn't the type of blog that dwells on sadnesses. This is a blog filled with hope, and determination, and possibility. Yes, the year felt unfairly hard, but I am at the end of it and I have survived! I have learned things and I have grown - hopefully - into a stronger, better version of myself.

And maybe 2019 will be a much better year. Or maybe it won't. But the lesson here is that I will make it through the year and everything will be okay. I can do it.

So while I usually write a nice summary of my year which includes mentions from all the lovely people who feature in my life - my family, Mr EP, my friends - this year I'm just going to leave this short note here, accompanied with what I think is possibly one of the best photos of the year. I think this image represents me somehow - please enjoy it while I wander off and happily do very little for the rest of 2018. See you in the New Year! :)

Sunday, 7 January 2018

Hello 2018 :)

I am working hard on being balanced. There's a lot to be doing and not really much time: a lot of tension and an already heavy heart.

So I have started something new! For the last 7 days in an interesting new rhythm has developed. I work for a couple of hours, then walk for an hour, before going back to work. That one hour's walk - come rain some shine - has been a blessing. It was hard on New Year's Day (both cold AND side-ways rain) but I think I have it all worked out now. I have some brand new wellies and I am ready to walk. Here are some photos of some of my lovely walk moments:

When the light, a building and a frozen lake lines up for a shot.

I loved the frozen lines on this fallen tree trunk.

It has been so cold recently that all the puddles were frozen.

I met this lovely dude. He came to say hello while munching away.

I met this little guy too. I might have to go back and give him an apple.

Walks like these give me time to breathe. Even if the driving rain and wind throw my sideways, I know that they can be overcome. Or at least, there is an end to it, and somewhere safe and warm to return to. I like the forward motion: the constant onwardness of walking. It gives my mind peace and a bit of space to think clearly.

There will be many more walks in my future, a moment of glorious play to right my work hours. It's not a resolution - I know that this can not be an every day thing so I don't want to be sad when I skip a day, but it is going to be something I'm determined to preserve whenever I can. This is my play this year - hope you will find a way to play too.